Happy Total Defence Day!

haha.. happy total defence day everyone.. =)

it's a dreadful day for me because after one week of leave, i finally had to go back to work today. so dreadful, somehow donno y it was so nice to sleep on valentines day. LOL!! i was like sleeping like a log, even till this morning, i don even want to wake up for work!!! LOL!! =X hai.. but still, i have too.. =( sad. anyway, its scary to return to work after such a long time and with uptight heavy events coming up. i think i've chosen the wrong dates for my leave, but nevermind la, i still needed the rbeak sooner or later and of course the sooner it is, the better it is either. =D hee.. had so many thigns to settle today when i went back, worked non stop since the morning. Even my lunch was delayed for one and half hours. i was supposed to meet Jessie for lunch between 1.30pm to 2pm but end up i only was free for my lunch at 3pm!! gosh! i was dead hungry!!! =X den again went back to work and stuffs.. ggrrrrr.. so many changes and so many things to do.. i was really tired man.. den had to plan my manpower for this weekend.. sometimes i really wanna ask myself why do i have to do all these. does it benefit me at all??? maybe it does, i donno. anyway i kept hearign from MANY MANY MANY people that I SHOULDN'T BE WORKING IN THIS PLACE AT ALL!! they say i should be somewhere better and not be doing what i'm doing currently.. and SERIOUSLY, sometimes, or rather almost always, i ask myself " are they saying the truth, or are they just trying to be sacarstic to me because i'm not good enough?" i'm really sorry to say this but i donno la. perhaps like what my cousin and i thought - i might really be suffering from depression.. maybe.. right?

Anyway she's just so cute to out of a sudden ask me " have you gone to the doctor to check if you really am suffering from depression?" LOL!! i really laughted out hard. haha but i guess she's right. anyway, i do think that i am suffering from depression because the symptoms are there. i don go to the doctore because its expensive. and... i donno how to face it either.. well, i might think i have the symptoms of depression but yet i think i'm not. because, i feel that if i go to the doctor, the doctor will tell me i'm crazy and send me to IMH instead!!! =X i donno.. im really confused.. hai..

i've really got the worst memory in the world. is there any way that can cure my poor memory?? sometimes i even wonder if i actually have any memory. "HEY!!! DID SOMEONE TOOK OUT MY MEMORY CARD??!!!!" -.-"" very lame i know..

anyway, congrats to SHA for his arrival of his new born baby boy by the name of Ezra Matyn Shaleh. heehee what a cool name right! lol. today is HIS birthDAY... and today is Melissa's BirthDATE. and it's also Raymond's birthDATE. LOL!! makes sense doesn't it?? LOL!! i've got nothign better to do i guess..


I'm so tired now.. just back home from extending work at PL because Sha's wife gave birth.. its just not my day la.. so many thigns happened.. people drank alot and was high, talked alot, did many wrong things.. Hai. when can i be more stern handling such people!!! -.-" i cannot make it man. i'm a TCMIP- Totally Cannot Make It Person!! or maybe Pig, it starts with P as well.. hai... save me from hell.....

"Things, people and life is always so complicated - why do
we always need to make a choice in who to listen or trust, especially in work..
its really confusing me too much..."